Taiwan

So at the request of some parents (ahem Sally) we have started getting together some of the funny, stupid and just plain retarded things that we see here, on the wonderful island of Taiwan.  Since we are all teachers a lot of our stories have to do with students, which makes them even better. So... enjoy!

Teacher: What's "recycle?"
Student: It's bicycles brother.

Student: I know how your married teacher.
Teacher Steph: How?
Student: (pointing to Steph's boobs) Because you have really big NaNas.

On a Test. 
Student had to give a Would/If sentence:
Teacher Lucas would have a baby if he brought his girlfriend into the bedroom.

English Names (not joking) we have seen in Taiwan

• Oyster
• Fanny
• Monkey
• Ugly
• Kool
• King
• Ice
• Pedigree
• Poccrolli
• Moluko
• Yo-Yo
• Dinosaur
• Mr. Chen (a 7 year old)
• Turtle
• Fish
• Looger
• Poo-Poo
• Watermelon
• Genius
• Snow White
• What's going on?
• First
• Vladamir
• Popeye
• Mario & Luigi (twins)
• Circle
• Seven
• Cartoon
• Tank
• Pony
• Rain
• Snow
• Happy
• El Reno
• Power of Guitar King
• Dolphin
• Nike
• Spanky
• Wii (like the game)
• Lebron James
• Bumble Bee
• Cabana (sisters name was Coco)
• Fuck (sorry,  but its not a joke)
• Dog
• Meatball (for a girl)
• Ball
• New
• Adult DVD
• I don't know
• Superman (girl)
• Only
• I'm Sorry
• Zuzer
• Money
• Axel
• Master

       

At our favorite dinner place, where we go every Friday night. We call it English Menu, because, it has a english menu. Our Taiwanese friend/student Sean had a few too many Taiwan Beers.

Sean: My English is getting drunk.

At the train station where we park our scooters, the guy loves us and always tries to speak English.

Parking Guy: Nice to see you!

Me: You too!

P.G.: That will be eighty (as in 80NT)

I give him a 100NT bill

P.G.: (giving me my change) two-ty. Canada Amy say it twenty... I say you not know TaiwaneseEnglish.

Me: Oh! Yes, she doesn't know I guess! Thank you very much!

P.G: No Q!

he also says:

10- one-ty

20- two-ty

30- three-ty